REGAINING BALANCE THROUGH
MUTUAL-HELP
A Story from Life
Written 2009. Updated April, 2014.
The following story from life may provide a glimpse of natural
nurturers engaging in mutual-help during a time when they’re all extremely
stressed and in an ongoing extremely stressing context.
None had any prior knowledge or experience of the ways they
used to return each night to wellness.
This story may frame the processes referred to in the RAD
documentation.
These humble village women know
they will be left alone till morning. They’re now by themselves in the militia
torture centre. The guard’s footsteps are receding. It’s night time. The women
are about to start doing what they have been doing the past week in the centre.
And this is a special night. They know that if the militia keep to pattern,
tomorrow afternoon they will be released back into the waiting comforting arms
of their female friends. This will be the last time they do this in this place.
And they’re all listening for
and now hearing the distant receding footsteps of the militia person who had
just locked them up for the night.
They now know they will be
undisturbed till sunrise.
It is now safe for them to
begin their healing process.
This is the self-healing
process that has been sustaining them through this very demanding week.
They are now beginning with
their way of regaining their Body-Brain, their autonomy, and their integrity
after being abused by the militia all day
The women are commencing to go
through a sequence that they have been evolving together over the past week.
They’re beginning the first
soft wailing together while taking turns in cradling each other as babies -
rocking gently like they’re babies again in nurturing arms - taking all the
time they need for feeling the releasing changes beginning to occur in their
bodies now. And when the time is right, they’re taking turns to cradle and be
cradled.
And after a time, when they
sense the time is right for it, beginning now the slow stretching and rolling
around on the floor like babies. – taking all the time they sense they need in
doing that now.
And now coming to sitting - and
now standing - and being aware of shifting, and changing the quality of their
breathing - .and attending to and sensing how their ribs are beginning to move
more freely again - moving in relating with each other – and noticing how their
ribs are moving towards and away from their spine, in all directions .
So now they’re slowly moving
with awareness, attending to and being aware, and sensing their moving, and
noticing how their feeling, and their sensing is changing with their moving.
They commence feeling the growing of a calm centred silence of their minds.
These changes are becoming familiar to them and they have been so look forward
to being together doing these things, so again they are sensing the nature of
their beating heart slowing down more now - and so appreciating how their heart
is beginning to feel now. Sensing all of the returning good feelings and
sensations that are now beginning in radiating out from their heart and moving
through and around them.
And now beginning to come to
standing and commencing balancing movements - to regain their balance - the
balance that the militia had taken away from them; and so, beginning in sensing
balance while standing still.
And having that centred balance
returning, beginning in their own good time in sensing balance while moving
their upper body - their neck - and how their head is moving in relating with
their neck. Sensing their spinal cord. Sensing the whole-of-it. Moving gently.
And again when their time is
right for it – being guided by their own returning wellness, commencing their
sensing of their balancing while walking slowly with awareness; making subtle
shifts in their ways of their moving – to notice difference - and to notice the
difference that makes the difference - and appreciating that difference - just
like the leper of faith that appreciated his wellness.
Now with healing – as in making
whole again – and healing artistry - the very slow moving is becoming the
dance. And they are starting together now - harmoniously and rhythmically and
softly making the sweet sounds that they have been dancing to each night for
the past week. And their dancing and singing and rejoying - reconnecting with
joy - increasing their joy
of life and living - the French ‘ joie de vivre’ - and when they’re sensing
their attuned collective time is right for it - dancing with joy into each
other’s arms - merging their energies - embracing each other - and looking deep
into each other’s eyes - and receiving each other - in all of their fullness -
and receiving this fullness into each other’s hearts - and then settling for a
good nights renewing rest, ready for what the next day may bring.
And after sharing this story
with me, these women continue speaking to me about how they walked together from
the torture centre the next eve knowing their girlfriends would be waiting for
them around the corner - and now here they are walking into the waiting arms of
their sisters - and their girlfriends are amazed at how well the group are
looking and responding. .
And the receiving girlfriends
are especially amazed when one of the group asks, ‘does anyone have batteries
and a record player so we can all dance together’.
And the group then begin
walking and telling their friends how they have been nurturing themselves each
evening in the torture centre - and they begin sharing what they have been
doing - and these women begin to recognise that they have been doing something
very special together.
These women in safer times are
now visiting villages where they have never been before - and they’re having
the mothers agree for these women to play with the children of the village. And
in the play, they’re having the children playing pretend games - pretending to
be babies - and rolling on the floor - and cradling each other - and then
rolling to standing - and playing balancing games - as the militia have taken
away the children’s balance as well (.forcing children to see what no human
should ever see - for scrambling brains - for social control). And so, instead
of frozen horror in unbalanced cringing children, the children are regaining
their balance - and regaining the joy of life and living - which is every
child’s birthright
And now the children – who are
at first very shy are becoming very excited – as with no power and no musical
instruments they rarely hear music. So now with music in their ears and hearts,
the children naturally begin dancing. And as this joy-filled dancing of the
children is occurring - their mothers watch. And when the time is right for it
- one of the visiting women says gently to the onlooking mothers
Perhaps
you can - come and dance with us -
and
with your children - and move your bodies with us -
as we
are survivors too
And these village women know
the full significance of what the woman means by those last five words - and so
the mothers join in with the dancing - at first tentatively - and in feeling
the dance - and seeing the joy of their children in seeing their mothers
dancing - joy fills all.
BACKGROUND LINKS:
RAD Links
o Rapid
Assessing of Local Wellness, Psycho-Social Resources & Resilience Following
Disasters (RAD)
o
Recognising and Evolving Local-lateral
Links Between Various Support Processes
o
Action Researching RAD in the Field
o Outline Of A RAD Project Proposal
o RAD Experiential Learning Gatherings
o Self Care of the RAD Rapid
Deployment Team
o Possible Terms of Reference for RAD Assessment of
Local Psychosocial Resources and Wellness
o Responsibility
for Distributing RAD Reports
On LACEWEB